Daily: 28th February 2011

28 February, 2011 at 00:10 (GMT)

By RG

Oh boo. Everyone's favourite Daily post writer for Monday, that'll be me (just erasing the doubt you had in your mind, funny people) is currently back at school after a lazy half term (and struggling around sixth form with a calf injury again (which was caused playing football people)) and is also writing this engrossed in the Accenture Matchplay Final between Martin Kaymer and Luke Donald. So, have yourself the pilot episode of CSI: Sidepodland.

Glissom: Another body then. Any identification?

Strokes: Yes, a Mr. Sergio Perez, Mexican chap, seems to be very popular lad. We found this photo in his wallet, looks like him anyway.

Glissom: Good work. Hedges.

Hedges: Well, looks like he had a rough ride. Seemed to be in some sort of brawl, and ended up here.

Siddle: Found something here, looks like a wireless device, clown shaped.

Mace: Looks like someone fancied a bit of Giggles Radio

[Intro Music, knowing the tradtion of CSI it has to be The Who, so I say, 'The Seeker]

Flick: Well, looks a tough one. Any witnesses?

Ducko: One, goes by the name of Wojciech Szczesny.

Flick: And?

Ducko: Well I tried to interview, but he just kept dropping the ball.

Flick: Eh?

Ducko: He bottled it.

Flick: Oh, got ya. Hey Mace, got a friend, deals in this sort of thing, you might like to know. Hald on, got a call, 338, 338 people, get to it. Don't want to draw this one out.

Ducko: To the Infiniti store, and beyond.

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