Geoff: "Hello and welcome to Well Known Shaving Cream sponsored Daily Special, with me, Geoff Stelling. Alongside me this week are as usual four crazy, mad men to take us through todays daily. With me are Matt Le Tissue, Paul Marson, Phil Thumpson and Charlie Oh Look at Me I used to play for Arsenal aren't they all great."
Everyone Else: "Morning"
Geoff: "Right, lets get this weeks daily under way, any early action going on in the News of Formula 1 Matt?"
Matt: "I'm afraid not Geoff, its all a bit dull at the moment. There was some half chances early on but all that has been reported is a link with Bruno Senna to Lotus."
Geoff: "Covering the game at the blogosphere is Paul, is it any better than the news?"
Paul: "Much brighter start, Pat has already broken the deadlock with a fine post about his visit to the Belgian Grand Prix. Some say he should have put this sort of post in ages ago, but you know what, when it mattered, he duly delivered. Great stuff."
Geoff: "How is it looking down at the Other Stuff?"
Phil: "Not so bad Geoff, it has been a good start, Codemasters have released their first patch and this is much more improved than the one he replaces. Less errors, silly mistakes have been taken out and his whole round performance is top notch. Quality."
Geoff: "And finally Charlie, whats it like down..."
Geoff: "I'll break off there, Phil, whats going on?"
Phil: "This is just, unbelievable. It is fast, too fast, everytime he gets it you think its just going to go straight through the stand, but no, it sticks to where its going, sensational. It feels as if it has been designed by the great Adrian Newey himself, a masterclass, it should not work, it doesn't feel real, and well, thats because it isn't."
Geoff: "Right we are approaching half way through the daily, hows things going so far?"
Matt: "Awful Geoff, I've seen more news at a funeral."
Paul: "Yeah, Sidepodcast have just woken up and have basically scored two quick podcasts. A lovely little one two with Joe Saward for the first, the second was a magnificent solo effort. Its very one sided here at the Blogosphere."
Phil: "Nothing but drama here too, I've seen some magical things so far in the daily, top quality stuff."
Geoff: "Sadly we don't have time for Charlie, Paul, more incidents I hear at the Blogosphere?"
Paul: "It is all over now, Mrs C has split from Sidepodcast for the moment, and ends up solving her own puzzle, extrodinary stuff."
Geoff: "Approaching the end now, Matt, surely something has happened?"
Matt: "Nope, I'd rather watch a repeat of the Bahrain Grand Prix."
Geoff: "What has happened Phil?"
Phil: "Yes, the temperature at Other has rose, but after Mr C had a huge rant at the comments about the lack of speed sporting, Snooker has came out of its shell for once and produced a rather terrific event. Done and done here."
Geoff: "Final notes for the daily are now coming in, Newcastle Diamonds have won the Premier League Knockout Cup, we have a new Scrabble champion, more on that from Dean later, and I hear something dramatic has happened, with Chris Camera."
Chris: "Unbelievable Geoff, unbelievable. You think nothing has happened in the football section of the daily Geoff, and then this happens. You've lost all faith in footballers, they are a bunch of overpaid people, respect is limited, and then, out of the blue, Benoit Assou-Ekotto does the unthinkable and not only says he only does it for the money, but will give the majority of his money to charity. What a man. Unbelievable."
Geoff: "Unbelievable indeed, now for the classified links..."
A homage, to the greatest show on a Saturday Afternoon between 12pm and 6pm on a weekly basis.
P.S - Mark Clattenburg is from Consett, North East. He is worse than Cheryl Cole and North Shields, combined, times by seven and to the power of ten. That is all I will say about that.